I’d like to give a very warm welcome to my dear friend Lauren who blogs over at Shooting Stars Mag. Not only is she a dear blog friend, she’s also an incredibly supportive addition to our Peaceful Posse group and just a wonderful human being in general. I’m so excited to share this personal story of hers here on my blog today and hope you’ll join me in giving her a very warm pixie welcome as she discusses her journey and self-discovery on identifying as bisexual.
Take it away, Lauren!
I didn’t fully come out as bisexual until late 2016; it hasn’t even been a full year. In fact, it was the night of the 2016 election. To be upfront, I voted for Hillary Clinton and when it seemed like Donald Trump was going to win, I was scared for everyone that identified as LGBT+, especially due to the vice-president nominee, Mike Pence. That night, I came out on Facebook (before then, only three people knew). This is what I wrote:
We can’t nominate someone whose vice president believes in conversion therapy and has fought for years to take away LGBT+ rights. Oh, and I guess this is a good time to mention that I identify as bisexual. Not exactly a wonderful coming out, but I feel like I have to stand up in some way for all those people that will be more persecuted than I will if Trump wins…
and even if he doesn’t. It should not be this close, America.
Obviously, we know that he did win, but what I thought was amazing is that after I posted this, so many of my friends and family members liked it, commented, or reached out in another way. These included people that I know voted for Trump, but they stood with me and that meant a lot.
Before this grand coming out, I had only told three people – as I mentioned above. I didn’t grow up feeling different or wondering about my sexuality. To be honest, I didn’t come out to anyone until my mid-twenties. I wasn’t keeping it a secret; it’s just that I didn’t realize it. I fully support LGBT+ people, but when it came to myself, I didn’t question things a lot. I’d always been attracted to guys but I’d never dated anyone – guy or girl. It wasn’t until college that I really started to notice girls more and develop crushes, but again, this still didn’t register much for me. I suppose at the time, I saw it more as “I want to be their friend” and not “I want to date them” but I eventually figured it out. Some of those girls I’d been attracted to in college? I was attracted to them, as more than just a friend.
I think it’s important to realize that identifying as LGBT+ isn’t always cut and dry, especially when you’re bisexual. Yes, you’re attracted to both guys and girls but that doesn’t mean it’s split down the middle 50/50. I’m attracted to more guys than girls, but that doesn’t negate that I’m attracted to girls. I could see myself dating – and even marrying – either gender. While I assume most people in my life know I’m bisexual after that Facebook post, it’s not something I regularly talk about with people, so I’m sure there are still those who aren’t aware. That’s okay though – they can find out or not; it doesn’t matter to me. After all, it doesn’t define who I am as a person.