I’d ask those two gentlemen at the gym to politely direct their attention away from the girl who was just trying to get in a few pushups after work
I’d tell the blast from the past who randomly Facebook messaged me that NO, I don’t want to be a member of her face cream sales force because quite frankly she was a total b to me back in high school
I’d explain to the woman who crossed the street that she really should be careful because I nearly hit her with my car, which is literally my biggest fear in life (I’d try to be nice about it, though she was yelling at me when I accelerated at green and she had the stop sign)
I’d tell the 4,000 agents who’ve called me since Tuesday that yes, I filled in an online form to find out next steps for a bank loan, but NO I don’t need them calling me round the clock (thankyouverymuch)
I’d add all the “ERECT ON DEMAND” email addresses to a mailing list and automate emails that would go out every hour, on the hour (without an unsubscribe option). Someone show me how to do this?
I’d go for more drives alone, to neighboring beaches and mountains and lose myself in the scenery for a little while
I’d squeeze every avocado before making a final decision. Does anyone else get anxious while doing this? (HAVE I SQUEEZED TOO MANY? BEEN HERE LONG?!)
I’d totally rock mermaid hair
These are just a few of the things I’d do if I had a set of cojones. What about you?