Walking under an atomic sky

– Posted in: dating, Eat Pray Love journey, on writing/blogging

Road Trip!

Over the past few days, I have struggled to admit something that has been bothering me for months. I started developing an irrational fear that there may come a time when I would either run out of things to discuss on my blog or that I would deter my readers with my directionless drivel. I felt I was being pulled along many different paths, but the finish line always held the same outcome: I have no fucking clue where I’m going. 

I participated in a live chat with members from Studio30plus.com last night and was innocently enough asked to describe my blog in a 30-second elevator pitch. I completely froze.

I used to have a clear vision and purpose here. My Pixie Blog started as a culmination of my musings on life as a 30-something-year-old who was trying to find herself again after the dissolution of a long-term relationship. Readers sat shotgun while I drove through life, detailing the mistakes, trysts, and sordid events along the way… they were there when my lust for life coursed through my veins on a dance floor in Vegas and while I traversed this country following Phish.

I wore the title of “single blogger” proudly for years. I attended networking events aimed at singles and made contacts with representatives interested in luring my young, mostly female demographic.

When I least expected it, I met someone who has changed my life in many beautiful and profound ways. While the transition to being “in a relationship” wasn’t an easy one to make, I took baby steps and Bryan waited patiently until I was ready to fully embrace the idea of being in love once more. As the circumstances around me ebbed and flowed, so did my writing. While I still enjoy nights out with the girls whenever possible, I respect that there are lines I can’t cross in my writing and on my blog. I am no longer a “single blogger.” But I don’t want to be an “in a relationship” blogger either. Because there is much more to life–and me–than that one detail alone. I imagine this is the same internal struggle that many mommy bloggers experience in such a broad category.

Rather than punish myself for this revelation, I want to embrace the idea that my blog is a never-ending journey and I am a proud woman in transition. The focus of My Pixie Blog is to share in all the ups and downs with good friends, fine wine, and a discussion about the meaning of it all: love, LIFE, and lessons learned. That will be my new elevator pitch.

All who wander are not lost. I am living proof.

22 Comments… add one
Naked Girl in a Dress November 16, 2012, 11:52 AM

It sounds like you found you way again. In blogging, just as in life, we meander down different paths. Some are wonderful explorations, and we continue to move forward. Others we wonder why we are are the path, and return in the direction from which we came. I think you are now on a wonderful exploration, and we love reading each step of the way on your journey.

Thanks for what you share here!

Gia November 16, 2012, 3:20 PM

haha, I too think about this sometimes. Coupled with “gosh, I write about relationships a lot, maybe I need to mix it up”. But at the end of the day, this is our forum and once we turn it around and start to consider what our audience expects, it loses it’s organic appeal. I think you’re doing a wonderful job and I imagine that you will only continue doing so! I think viewing your writing through the years as a beautiful written journey is a great way to look at it. XOXO <3

Amber November 16, 2012, 4:22 PM

I think that sounds like a wonderful elevator pitch/mission statement/reason for blogging. I’ve been struggling to find my focus lately, but just came to the conclusion that I miss this stuff, so I’m back in the mix again. I think. I’d miss you if you if you weren’t here!

Rachel Cotterill November 16, 2012, 5:02 PM

Here’s to the variety of life *chinks glass* and the wine, of course.

Mrs. Match November 16, 2012, 5:43 PM

I couldn’t agree more. It was a difficult transition for me too-especially with the title of my blog. I just try to stay true to myself and blog about me-relationship, friendships, life, baby and everything in between. I know you’re always true to yourself too, and it’s one of the reasons I love reading your blog!

Heather O. November 16, 2012, 6:34 PM

It is somewhat difficult for me to describe my blog as well. I tend to go with “a blog about my life and my family” or something fairly generic, but that really doesn’t do it justice. I’ve been blogging for eleven years. I’ve blogged as a new mom, a small business owner, a divorcing mom, a single mom with mental issues, a mom who drinks/drugs and sometimes writes when she shouldn’t… an “in a bad relationship” mom, a woman who fell in love & got married again, a mom of tweens, a mom with a stillborn baby. None of those are who I am… because all of those are who I am, who I have been. I can’t pinpoint what my blog is, because in some ways I’m still figuring out who I am. And you know, I think that’s just fine.

Shauntelle November 16, 2012, 11:41 PM

YAY! I love this and I think you’ve discovered the perfect elevator pitch. 🙂 Thanks for sharing the journey with us.

Alexandra November 17, 2012, 12:00 AM

People want that proof, Charlotte.

It gives us hope.

I met my husband at 33, married him at 35, and I remember the years before then: worried I’d find no one, ever.

BUt I had good people tell me: continue to be choosy, continue to wait for the best. Happily married at 65 is better than miserably hitched at 33.

Jill of PJgamers.com November 17, 2012, 1:38 AM

There’s a beauty in writing consistently. Your words flow well. You shouldn’t worry so much.

Single Mom in the South November 17, 2012, 8:10 AM

We are never just one thing, but sometimes one thing dominates us and when that changes, it’s good, but hard to redefine ourselves. Good for you for..not reinventing, but reorganizing!

carma November 17, 2012, 2:04 PM

Well I think you summed it all up very well right there in the last line. Used to be everyone was stressing that we must have a “niche” for our blogs but to be honest I’ve always preferred the slice of life blogs which is what I would consider mine as well. It gives a nice glimpse into someone’s life and makes for interesting reading (unless it is my blogs ;-))

Keep on doin’ what you’re doin’

Krysten November 17, 2012, 7:07 PM

Lady, you have always been so much more than just a single blogger. And you’re more than just a blogger in a relationship too! I love coming here because you have a way with words and because you really share who you are.

Believe me, no matter your relationship status your readers are going to want to read your words.

Marie Nicole November 18, 2012, 2:28 PM

Blogs are so organic. They live and flow just as we do. I would struggle with a 30 second elevator pitch about “Who is Marie?” just as much as trying to describe my blog. But I love the answer you’ve written – which is of course as eloquent as you are.

Oh and that picture you chose? How perfectly awesome! I love it!

Nicole November 18, 2012, 8:00 PM

This is your blog. And my blog is my blog. Everyone’s blog is their blog. You would be miserable if you tried to write someone else’s blog. You could’ve gone dark after meeting Bryan, but you know, as do all your readers (it’s evident in the comments above mine), that there is FAR more to you than your relationship status. YOU are the reason we come. Not who you are or aren’t dating. You share far more of yourself than that, and that’s why we love you.

I struggle with the niche also. And then I remind myself why my blog exists.

Incidentally, my blog exists because of your inspiration.

Jester Queen November 19, 2012, 9:37 AM

Awesome!!! And I liked the 30 second version too.

Star Traci November 19, 2012, 2:21 PM

I have much the same challenge. My blog started as a quest for my lost artist. I then got labeled as a Mommy blogger. I do write about my kids and I love being a Mommy but I don’t want to be limited to that label. I was asked the same question and I don’t have a short answer — just a quirky blogger, I guess.

Whatever your label, I love your blog.

Kimberly November 19, 2012, 8:15 PM

The coolest part, Charlotte, is that as YOU stretch and grow, so do we as your audience. I collect wisdom from your words…and gratitude from your heart…you bring something special to the blogosphere.

Blond Duck November 19, 2012, 10:37 PM

We all have to grow and change! I think now your blog is an exploration of love and discovering your new creative loves….

keishua November 19, 2012, 11:21 PM

i think blogging is all about changing. growing in your life and taking the reader along. it might be messy but it can beautiful thing.

Lindsey January 9, 2013, 9:47 AM

I think every writer has the fear that we will eventually run out of things to say. I don’t remember who said it, but I remember reading a quote once that said do you think the world doesn’t deserve your art or are you just too afraid to create it. I think we have to keep going no matter what life throws at us.

Marie Nicole January 9, 2013, 10:54 AM

I think our blog is a portrait to ourselves. Just because you are in a relationship it doesn’t mean your blog has to become a relationship blog. You are more than a girlfriend, you are a daughter, a friend, a colleague, a writer, etc. So your blog reflects you where you are now in your life. Being single is like being unemployed. It takes over and shapes your life. But the rest, just adds to enrich it. Not that being single means not being enriched. But us humans aren’t shaped and designed for solitary life.

Ugh. I always get myself so tangled in my comments sometimes! 😉

Joe January 10, 2013, 9:08 PM

Single. Unsingle. Settled. Unsettled. Just keep blogging, right? I love that last line. It’s very true, and knowing so can be the source of tremendous comfort.

Go forth!


I dunno. Forth!

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