Howdy, all. Please give a very warm welcome to a friend of mine who will be guest blogging here today. Her name is Emily and she’s intelligent, funny, fabulous, sweet, and cute as a button. I could sing her praises all day long but I’ve asked her to guest post here today so you can all see how wonderful she is for yourselves. She has also been my online dating guru as of late and has been very helpful in prepping me for the world of internet matching. Please show her some love by clicking on her linky and thank you, Emily, for a fantastic guest post.
The other day I was in the bagel place in my neighborhood on a Saturday morning and an attractive gent was on line in front of me. I smoothed out my hair, unbuttoned my jacket and gave my best, “look at me” look. He was next in line and when it was his turn to order, he did the unthinkable – he ordered two bagels. One for him and one other low fat scooped-out version that was most definitely for his significant other, who was probably waiting for him at home, all snuggled up in bed, thankful she’s not some silly single girl who has to go out in the cold morning to get a bagel for one.
Since it seems that things like this have been happening to me more and more, it’s a wonder people meet the old fashioned way anymore, meaning, in person. I tried online dating twice before, and wound up with a bunch of freaks (one guy who told me I had ugly clothes and another who drove two hours to not smile). However, I’ve been contemplating trying it again. Well actually, I am trying it again, but to no avail. You see, I try to be as open as possible to the guys that message me but seriously, if I can figure out why you’re single from one email, there is a problem. For example, half the messages I receive look like this:
“how are you?”
This may seem like a harmless opener but to me it feels like a lazy attempt at starting a conversation. I don’t even get a capital letter? Another common trend I see is after a few emails with a guy, he says something to the effect of “let me know if you want to get together for a drink.” I don’t know if its insecurity, immaturity, or just stupidity, but whatever the reason is, there seems to be an epidemic of guys who can’t just man up and ask a girl out! I have to let him know? Is this his way of saving himself from possible rejection? Like if I say no, it’s not such a big deal because it’s not like he really asked me out anyway? To me this is another sign of laziness that could possibly equate to me having to do all the work if a relationship ever developed.
I know it seems like I’m being harsh, but every once in a while I’ll get a charming and witty message from a guy, we’ll exchange a few emails, and he’ll ask me out like a gentleman, and I’ll realize that there are normal men out there. Men who are mature, who want to treat a girl like a lady, and who are secure enough in themselves to take a chance.
But of course, right after I get an email from a gentleman, I’ll get an email like this:
“Hi, Nice profile. I’m a dominant married man, looking for a relationship with a passionate, sweet, nice woman. Interested?”
Where is the lower-case “hey” guy when you need him?