As part of my mission to pick up resolutions that resonate with me in 2012, I added another just a few hours ago on my morning commute: to be present in each moment. It came to me when I noticed a woman texting while crossing a busy intersection with her baby in a stroller. I think it’s entirely unfair for me to judge the actions of this woman when I myself am often fiddling with a phone, new Kindle, or iPod, but it does say something about the culture we live in… we’re just so damn preoccupied with STUFF all the time.
I want to hit the pause button a bit more often this year. To just feel and be.
I’m trying to change my ways and have for the past few weeks reconnected outside of the beeping world of electronics. I want real face time because a girl needs her friends for dinner, to talk about life’s stresses, and to get a mani with every now and then. I have had the good fortune of doing all of these things in the past few weeks, not because life is lookin’ bad, but because I don’t want this season to pass me by. To know me is to understand that this is my season of hibernation, but I love my friends (and boyfriend) far too much to spend all that time under the covers (well, some time under the covers with Bryan is never a bad thing…).
Last week I had Ethiopian in Hell’s Kitchen with an old coworker I hadn’t seen in ages. It was fun to shoot the shit with her and catch up on the past nine years since we’d last seen each other (also, where in the hell does the time go?). She is a divorced mother of three and is taking tentative steps to get back out into the dating world. As we rolled our bread and dug into the delicious and colorful vegetarian food in front of us, she asked a question that transcends all ages, cultures, and backgrounds. “What in the hell is going ON out there??” She described online dating as a battle zone of sorts and told me about some of the weirdos she had encountered lately. We swapped horror stories and laughed over the absurdity of it all. She let me know that contrary to popular belief, older men still don’t always have it figured out.
I also went to Rosa Mexicano in Union Square with two of my besties as it had been some time since the three of us were able to plan a date night. For the first time in the history of our friendship, we all have significant others at the same time (one of them will soon get married), and it was fun to find out about their beaus and giggle into our sangria like old times. Also shout-out to the lovely Jill of Glamamom who apparently drove by me that evening as I was stepping into the restaurant!
Last night, I treated myself to a mani with a dear friend of mine who is also diving back into the online dating world after a bit of a break. I’m happy for her. I think she has a much healthier outlook since she participated in this dating detox. And now that I have a boyfriend, I can live vicariously through her stories.
How are you all coming along with your New Year’s resolutions? I’ll be honest: I’ve cheated a bit with the no smoking thing. I’ve had a few since, but I don’t feel the urge to smoke as I once did and I think I’m making strides in a very positive direction. I’m also learning the importance of shedding this thin skin and developing a thicker backbone. That’s still a work in progress, but we’re getting there.
You may also remember that my family lost it’s beloved beagle Linus in October. While there can never be another quite like him, I’m happy to meet a new shelter dog my parents are adopting this weekend. He’s a schnauzer/affenpinscher mix and quite possibly the most unattractive dog I’ve ever seen but I think he’ll make a beautiful addition to my crazy family. I’m happy they’re finally ready to welcome another dog into their home and lives again and I’m glad I’ll have a scruffy little guy to play with whenever I visit.
