My May Mantras

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“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away.”

I may have recently mentioned the chat I had with my downstairs neighbor, a single mom in her 40s who had her beautiful baby boy over a year ago.

It was a perfect spring day, my birthday actually, and we ventured through the neighborhood on our way to a local park so her son could run around a little bit and we could get some much-needed fresh air.

We touched on all things big and small that day. She told me about the time she was in the best shape of her life and the hours she spent at the gym each day but how she’d trade it all now for some more time with her father. I discussed my infertility struggles and my frustrations at not being able to conceive. We both confessed the other had something we were envious of. She wanted a relationship; I longed to hold my own baby.

Perspective.

“Charlotte, getting pregnant won’t make everything else fall into place.” I didn’t realize until she said it how much I believed that was true. I imagined that getting pregnant would be the answer to everything; never the beginning of other fears.

Comparison is the thief of joy, and yet, we rob ourselves of this pure bliss far too frequently, in hopes of attaining the Next Big Thing. I am very much aware that I am guilty of this, and yet, I have never really done anything to change my ways. In the spirit of the Peaceful Posse’s first-ever Mantra linkup, I’m dedicating this month to embracing life with open arms. It will be a busy month with a communion, apartment/house hunting, family stuff, friend get-togethers, and a trip to Texas, but that will help me lose myself in life for a while.

I got a little lost there, but there’s still time to right the ship and enjoy this beautiful journey.

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Are you linking up with us today? We’d love to have you! Join our Peaceful Posse Facebook blog group and let us know your May Mantras/goals by adding your link below!

XOXO


16 Comments… add one
Beth May 1, 2017, 10:27 AM

I have heard that quote about comparison being the thief of joy and I am too guilty of getting wrapped up in it myself. I need to try to let myself be ok with where I am more – it can be a challenge for sure! I hope you are able to enjoy all those things coming up for you this month and are able to embrace it all as it comes! Much love to you sweet lady!

Kimberly May 1, 2017, 11:22 AM

Every time I start to even compare I picture my OB who looks like Tom Selleck saying “If they say they’re not struggling, they’re full of shit”
It’s true. I’m 100 percent convinced that we are all messed up at some point in time and dealing with ugly things but we all don’t advertise it. I don’t want what you have.
I may want Kim Kardashian’s money but I don’t want her ass or her problems.
That’s how I see things. Put that on a poster. I ran out of coffee creamer this morning. Send help xoxo

Crystal // Dreams, etc. May 1, 2017, 12:22 PM

It’s so easy to get swept up in the comparison game and it can be so discouraging. I often have to remind myself that the person who I think has the “perfect life” also has things they feel are lacking. And, when I think about it, there are so many things in my life that I wouldn’t want to give up. I’m trying to focus more on those things and not what I’m “missing.”

Shann Eva May 1, 2017, 1:38 PM

I think Social Media really puts that comparison in our faces much more than it used to be. You always see all these wonderful pictures and hear about all these wonderful things, yet no one ever posts the bad stuff. I’m guilty of it too. I love how you’re changing your focus this month. It gives me some encouragement to do the same.

Emily May 1, 2017, 2:23 PM

I have heard of that quote “Comparison is the thief of joy” and completely understand. It’s sometimes hard not to compare yourself to others, but it’s important to remember that everyone has their own unique journey that they have to take.

Akaleistar May 1, 2017, 4:23 PM

Beautiful thoughts! I’m, also, guilty of thinking that one certain thing will make the rest of life fall into place, but that’s not how life works at all.

Tamara May 1, 2017, 4:51 PM

It’s true what everyone says – we all struggle in different ways and at different times. Boy, am I a hot mess sometimes!
xoxo

ShootingStarsMag May 1, 2017, 5:04 PM

Great post. I’m sorry that you’re struggling to have a baby. It’s definitely true that getting something positive in life doesn’t mean all your troubles go away. Plus, you can look at someone and covet what they have, but they can be doing the same thing with you – like you and your neighbor. It’s easy to compare your life to others, but I do try and accept what I currently have as much as I can. 🙂

-Lauren

Dominique May 1, 2017, 7:21 PM

Perspective can be helpful, but it doesn’t necessarily change the things we want xx

Shannon May 2, 2017, 12:00 PM

I did not realize you are unable to conceive Charlotte, I am so sorry. I, too, see myself often reaching for the “next big thing” but then again, I have a fear of remaining stagnant and NOT reaching for the next big thing. I just don’t want to rob myself of being present in the moment, either….#balance. lol

Jessica Bradshaw May 2, 2017, 12:07 PM

Love this link up idea!! The grass is always greener and it’s so easy to compare to others. However, we miss the blessings in our own lives when we do that. Perspective is so important and it sounds like you are back on your own journey. 🙂

Jenny May 2, 2017, 1:24 PM

Great post! I love the quote at the top. I have a couple of them framed and put one in the kitchen, one in my office. It’s a wonderful reminder. 🙂

Kim May 2, 2017, 1:56 PM

Girl! I am sending you big hugs right now. So many nights I laid in bed begging the universe to just please let me have just one baby and carry to term. I compared myself to all my friends who seemed to get pregnant as soon as their partners so much as looked at them. Comparison really is a thief. Where in TX will you be visitng???

Lindsay May 2, 2017, 7:28 PM

You wrote this so beautifully. She’s right, we’re always going after the next goal/next big thing/life event/what have and not looking at the underlying feelings and thoughts associated with. Sometimes we don’t even see what’s righ in front of us … I can’t put it into words. But none of this makes your struggles any less crappy. But somehow you must cope, and grow.
Love you momma xo

lisa thomson May 2, 2017, 9:06 PM

I guess we all do it, sometimes without even realizing it. Comparing our life with others but it does rob joy from our own. The grass isn’t always greener…etc. I feel for you, Charlotte. Wanting a baby is a real instinctual pull and desire that isn’t quelled until it happens. Does it solve everything? No but it does begin a new chapter. Sounds like your May is going to be wonderful!

Trish @ The Trish List May 4, 2017, 8:37 AM

This is beautiful Charlotte. I think we all often don’t everything into perspective. Someone says something, maybe not even intentionally and, Boom! it hits us. I have had that happen a lot this year and have had certain phrases or comments really talk to me. Really make me think. Thank you for sharing this. Live your life girls and the rest will fall into place when it’s ready! <3

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