On Easter Sunday, I watched children consume large amounts of sugar. They became bouncing balls of energy while I could barely move after four cookies and a bunny ear. At what age does our internal sugar switch start to malfunction?
In a few weeks, my best friend and I will be flying to a random town in Texas, where we’ll stay in a haunted hotel. I’m equal parts excited and nervous. Only my bestie could schlep me 1,400 miles away to stay in a room where it’s reported that hands caress you while you sleep.
When I sit down to write the average blog post, I Google a wide variety of random shit, like “distance from Montclair, NJ to Bumblefuck, Texas.” Or “cool best friend tattoos that aren’t peanut butter and jelly sandwiches” because that idea was already nixed. Here’s one I’m seriously considering:
I wish I knew how to play the ukulele or the washboard.
I spend too much time reading comments online and sometimes they make my blood boil, but every now and then I come across a gem like this one (about the giraffe that recently gave birth): “Oh, don’t mind me. I just have two hooves coming out of my hooha.”
I have this reoccurring nightmare that I am enrolled in a college but I keep sleeping through all of my classes. As someone who used to receive perfect attendance awards, I can’t think of anything more terrifying than waking up at the end of a semester and realizing I’ve missed every class.
While we’re on the subject of school, I’m watching the show 13 Reasons Why and it’s basically made me never want to have teenagers. Don’t get me wrong—I want children—heaps of them!—but I’m not sure what to do with them when they turn 13. This topic is open for suggestions.
When someone asks me what I’ve been listening to, I try to come up with impressive answers that run the musical gamut—from reggae to funk and from folk to indie—but really when I’m sitting in my car, I’m probably blasting Kesha from the dollar sign years or the Swedish hip hop/swing band the Movits. Check them out here—doesn’t this make you want to get up and boogie!?
What are some of your scattered thoughts? Are they anything like mine? XOXO and make it a great week, party people!